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Your husband: He will be the man that…

He will be the man that…

My husband…

Where do I even begin?

How could I possibly tell him how I feel?

Quite honestly, I am pretty terrible at verbally expressing my feelings.

But, give me a pen and paper (or a keyboard and a computer) and I can write my feelings all day long.

I do not feel like I tell my husband enough how much I appreciate him. 

Yet, I expect, and appreciate, when he tells me, “Thank you for everything you do for me.”

Of course, I always tell him back, and I mean it, too. 

But then I feel bad because, once again, he is telling me how much he appreciates me, and I don’t tell him until he tells me.

WHY DON’T I TELL HIM MORE?!?!

I certainly think about it. 

I definitely tell others what he does for me.

But I take for granted that he knows I appreciate, love, and adore him.

I try to show him by my actions…small actions, but still actions.

  • I make his dinner plate for him…usually before anyone else
  • I tickle/scratch his back (I must admit, this one is not done without complaint from me.)
  • I listen intently when he is telling me about work, or karate, even though I don’t understand a lot of it due to ignorance on my part.
  • On birthdays, Christmas, Valentines, and anniversary, I buy him gifts that he asked for (not every single time…sometimes they have to just be “it’s the thought that counts” gifts…and he loves those, too)

How often do I say, ” I love you. I appreciate you.”?

Oh, possibly not enough to even bother counting.

But, I would like to change that!

I would like to make an effort!

After all, I like to hear it…why should he be any different simply because he is a man?

So, I am going to challenge myself.

I am going to make an effort to say those words that can mean so much.

My husband will know he is adored, loved, and appreciated.

Will you? 

Will you take the challenge with me?

Will you make an effort to tell your husband, and mean it, how much you adore and appreciate him?

Maybe do something like a 14-day challenge…14-days filled with different ways to show and tell your husband what he means to you?

Yep, I’m all in…

After those 14 days, I won’t stop, and neither should you!

My marriage is a great marriage! 

We communicate, we respect each other, we pray for each other, we say I love you last before leaving the house and before going to bed (and we mean it), we trust each other, and we are a great team! We both work hard to help provide…he does his thing (karate) and I do mine (writing/reading), and it works well for us.

I will never grow tired of our marriage.

Read that again.

We both have our flaws (Lord knows mine are numerous), but we accept those flaws and don’t try to change each other. 

I don’t understand someone marrying someone and then trying to change them. (I am not referring to bad habits such as drugs or alcohol). I am referring to characteristics, personality traits, weird habits and/or pet peeves.

The man you married…

  • he will be the man you are sitting on your front porch with one day…
  • he will be the man you will spoil your grandkids with…
  • he will be the man you will watch your kids graduate college with…
  • he will be the man right beside as you go through the teenage years of your son/daughter 
  • he will be the man saying, “Time flies!” when your youngest baby is graduating Kindergarten…
  • he will be the man encouraging you to keep going and telling you, “You’re doing great!” in the labor and delivery room…
  • he will be the man to see your tears when no one else does…
  • he will be the man to hear your greatest fears…
  • he will be the man to see your most embarrassing moments (and lovingly shake his head and laugh)…
  • he will give you the hug you need right when you need it…the words you need right when you need them…and a kiss that will still make you melt 10 years later…

So, why change that? Why not let him be the man you fell in love with? 

I am not saying you can’t both change a little.

That’s inevitable as you get older, but it doesn’t have to be a bad thing.

My husband and I have changed since the day we said, “I do.”

We started going to church…I got saved…he rededicated his life to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, and things have changed…BUT FOR THE BETTER!

You know that illustration? The one that shows you that by getting closer to God, and putting Him first, you then get closer to each other.

Here it is…

Put God first

See how that works? 

THIS change is a good change! 

Read this scripture below…It is a very popular scripture for wedding ceremonies (I used it in my own), but the message is so much more important than it’s popularity. Read it carefully, and then try to emulate what it is saying.

Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up- 1 Corinthians 4

In other words, Charity (love) is patient, and is kind. It does not envy; it does not vaunt (boast or brag- definition here). It is not proud. 

That verse alone covers so much! Don’t be impatient with your husband (although you’re an imperfect human so…you know…it’s going to happen). But just try to make an effort…try your best…that’s all we can really do. 

Be kind to your husband! Yes, we are comfortable with our husbands, and we have to slap on a smile all day at work, so sometimes we want to be in our bad mood and guess who’s there for the taking?

Is that fair?

He’s been at work all day, too, slapping on a smile…would you want him to come home and take it out on you?

I didn’t think so…

Pride! Whoa, that’s a big one…That’s one thing that can ruin so many things if you let it. Stop being too proud to apologize, or to accept an apology. 

One thing my husband and I teach our kids is to always accept a sincere apology…

Because we are humans…imperfect humans…beautifully imperfect humans with human emotions that can sometimes get the best of us.

So, apologize, and accept the apology given to you!

Then, DON’T BRING IT BACK UP!

Leave whatever happened where it belongs…

Don’t make someone feel the need to apologize over and over again because eventually, they get so frustrated that the apology starts to mean nothing…It was sincere the first 5 times…now, it’s your turn to swallow your pride and let it go!

Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; -1 Corinthians 1:5

So, here it’s pretty clear…

Do not behave unseemly (or inappropriate, definition here). Behave as you would if Jesus was standing right in front of you.

But wait, He is always with us!

EXACTLY!

Jesus knows we won’t be perfect, but that is the reason for the cross! That is the reason for the sacrifice made! 

However, that doesn’t mean you go around acting how you want and saying what you want with no remorse or conviction, and then just praying for forgiveness later. 

You must try! Start your day with prayer, think before you speak and act, memorize scripture, and keep praying throughout your day!

It won’t make you perfect…that’s impossible…but it’ll certainly help…and the prayers will be heard…the effort will be noticed…and you will start to see a change in yourself.

It is not self-seeking (or selfish- definition here)…not easily provoked (read everything after “EXACTLY” again)…

It thinks no evil.

Look, sometimes you and your husband are going to get mad at each other.

That’s part of life.

Deal with it, apologize and move on.

Don’t think evil on one another.

Not just your husband, but anyone! We are to love everyone, and in turn, not think evil on anyone.

See definition of evil here …it has more meanings than you might think. 

Things you don’t perceive as “evil” are probably within that definition.

Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; -1 Corinthians 1:6

Pretty clear here as well…it does not rejoice in iniquity (or sin- definition here). But it does rejoice in the TRUTH!

Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. -1 Corinthians 1:7

Or it always protects (protect your husband in ways you can, and he will do the same for you and your family!), Believes and trusts all things (Believe and trust him, and he will believe and trust you), always has hope, and never gives up, no matter what (DO NOT GIVE UP ON YOUR MARRIAGE).

Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.-1 Corinthians 1:8

Love never fails.

LOVE never fails.

LOVE NEVER FAILS!

Remember that.

Marriage is sacred…it is an unbreakable bond…especially when you both put God first!

And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.-Joshua 24:15

AMEN!

To my husband, I love you! You do so much for me and the girls, and I pray you don’t feel it goes unnoticed. I feel loved, protected, safe, and secure with you. I trust you with all of my heart, and I love you with even more of it! I thank God for bringing us together all those years ago. You, besides God, are my rock…My best friend…My partner in life…and I wouldn’t want it any other way. I love you, and I appreciate you, and I look forward to whatever life throws at us next!

Now, I am on my way to making sure my husband feels the love I possess for him!

Will you? 😉

By Jesica: The Proverbs Mama

Busy, but BLESSED. Yep, that's me! My name is Jesica (yes, one 's') and I am a wife of a gorgeous, loving husband, a mom of three fantastic, beautiful girls (as well as a HUGE German Shepherd and an adorable chocolate lab). Oh, and I work full-time. So, as you can imagine, I stay pretty busy with a 40-hour work week, cooking, cleaning, gymnastics, ballet, doctor visits, vet visits, grocery shopping...and let's not forget trying to make sure my husband and I make memories other than us running around trying to get work and chores done...whew...So I am sure you're wondering why I started a blog on top of all of that...Well, I am starting a blog to help other moms, not only by giving tips for parenting, cooking, or cleaning, but to let you know that NONE of us are perfect and we ALL do things that we are sure NO OTHER mom does. Well, I am here to tell you that we ALL do that thing that you're sure NO OTHER mom does. So, grab a cup of coffee (or whatever your preference) and start feeling GOOD about your abilities as a mom, dad, wife, or husband. For we are fearfully and wonderfully made by our God, and His works are MARVELOUS.

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